I am lucky to have been raised by two beautiful, generous-hearted people who give and give without even thinking. It is simply their way. As a very young girl, small, everyday acts of generosity became fully engrained in me as the way we shared a life together. I learned that abundance comes and the heart feels full when you give. These quiet lessons weren’t spoken, only born through witnessing the act of sharing all we had with each other and anyone else in our lives. The generosity I learned from my family was expressed without showiness or self-importance. It was simply the way we experienced the world and I don’t know that my parents even realise there is something extraordinary in the life they created. For this gift, I thank my parents who always stretched their arms just a little wider to embrace us all, feed us all (and all the neighbor kids on the block, too).
Practicing generosity is the antidote to grasping. Aparigraha is the 5th vow or Yama as taught in Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra. Elsewhere I have discussed ahimsa, satya, asteya, and brahmacharya. Parigraha can be translated as “grabbing all around” or “reaching out for something and claiming it for oneself”. By adding the “A” in front of a word it becomes the antonym. So, the teaching is to develop a sensitivity to how much you need. What do you need? How much do you need?
Yoga teacher and writer, Ruth Lauer-Manenti says that each thing we have influences us. She described each physical object we own as putting one tiny particle of dust on the chittam, or mind field. If we carry too much with us on this journey the mind field gets covered in a thick layer of dust. It becomes difficult to see clearly. That image struck me deeply and has stayed with me. After contemplating Ruth’s interpretation of this sutra for over a year, I figure it’s high time for a little Spring cleaning of the heart and mind. Here’s to dusting off the chittam!
Starting with objects is easiest. List of questions to pose as I consider each item in my home:
- Do I love this?*
- Is it worth carrying with me?
- Is it useful?
- Is there someone I could give it to?
* Tricky. My teacher, ShunyaJi, says that we should practice giving away that which we love. She says especially anything that belonged to dead ancestors or holds a lot of nostalgia for us. She seemed to be encouraging us to give away whatever we hold on tightest to. I am simply not ready for that. Baby steps.
I have a memory of digging through the pantry to grab a few cans of “non-perishable items” to donate to some charity or other. My scrawny ten-year-old arms were reaching into the back of the cupboard for those dusty cans of less desirable vegetables and soups. My mother came by and offered a suggestion, “Find your favorite ones. Give those.” What? “Yes, Mother Teresa says you should give so that it hurts a little.”
So, as I sort through my objects, doing my Spring cleaning and hoping to get a handle on these dust bunnies in my mind, I’ll start to let go of all that I’ve been carrying that is no longer of use to me. Any habitual thinking that no longer serves me. Any old regrets. Since giving away material objects is simply practice for softening our grip on what we are most attached to in this life, I’ll remember to give a few of my favorites away, too.
-sara